Andrés RM Velarde
On Comparison.
I’m constantly comparing this present moment against all of the moments I’ve experienced in the past. When I wake up in the morning and observe the weather, I compare it to the weather of the previous day. When I try a new restaurant, I compare it to other restaurants I’ve tried before. When I see a concert, I compare it to all the other concerts I’ve been to. You get the idea.
At first, I was going to title this piece — On Comparison: The Thief of Awareness. Because when I’m in comparison mode, by default, I lose my ability to experience, savor, and realize the present moment. Instead of a focused awareness of the here and now, I too often find my mind racing into the past, a realm of memory and fantasy that has become distorted by time and emotion. And before long, the present moment is lost; stolen away by a seemingly insurmountable urge to compare reality with daydream.
But I think there is more to be said about comparison. I would be hard pressed to find another human who hasn’t, at some time or another, caught themselves in comparative rumination. It seems that comparison is innately human, and in many ways, gives us the ability to make sense of the world. When we compare this moment to those which came before, we are able to learn from our mistakes and make better decisions. When we compare our lived experiences with those of others, we are able to find common ground and compassion. When we compare our previous self to our current self, we are able to understand all the ways in which we’ve changed and grown (or haven’t).
In my estimation, a life devoid of comparison is one devoid of our humanity.
So what differentiates bad comparison (that which leads to traction-less rumination and a severance from the present) and good comparison (that which allows us to seek understanding)?
Discernment.
Comparison is not a thief of awareness, but an opportunity to practice and heighten our awareness. When I find myself in comparison mode, I now ask, “Is this serving me?” This simple question helps me discern whether my comparison is enriching my humanity, or depriving me of the ability to experience it — right here, right now.
To have the wherewithal to ask such a question, takes tremendous awareness. And this, my friends, is what I am practicing today. Farewell.
